whats on my television?

Robot chicken, ren and stimpy, charmed, family guy, hbo all the time...

poems

dying inside

i hold on
everytime
its burns my soul
only to find another lie
another worthless story
but i still hold on
why?
your not gone
i cant let go of the heartach inside
i just die
just let me die...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
watching waiting wondering
Current mood: blank
Category: Writing and Poetry

i sit here in darkness
waiting
watching
wondering
is there any hope for me in this world?
i can only ponder
for i will never know what shall become of me
the girl with the unforgettable face
yea thats who i am
i dont even like what i see
as i look in the mirror as what is known to be me
facing myself is a lie
i couldnt do it if i were to try
fate is all that awaits me
what is to become of this battered soul
and so i stare
i stare out my window
watching
waiting
wondering.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Every day i waste in sorrowful sighs, wondering whats above my cloud.... is there a rainbow waiting for me to slide down into a pot of gold, i shall never bestow this thought, for it is not my destiny to know what will become of me above this white, fluffy, empty cloud.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

what is life? just a mindless affliction of self indulgence, it is a generation of time that will never slow down nor speed up, as the clocks turn, the days turn into nights, nights turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, and the months turn into years. growing older i have noticed that nothing ever stays the same, our perspectives change on life, and the world comes crashing down, i know my family did, i have alcoholics, drug addictes, people who miss thanks giving because their backstabing, stealing, drug addicted, daughter wasnt invited, and at one time, i was a suicidal victim in our somewhat large family. unlike them, i want to do something with my life, i want to go to college, get a good job, marry a wonderful man, have some beautiful children, see places iv'e never seen before i die, and hopefully win the lottery, life is very random, you never know what will happen next, i choose my own path.........my destiny is what awaits.